Competition: Objective Complete?

Specifics

As a member of Dark Forge, you are expected to accomplish a wide array of tasks in the line of duty. Not a strictly military focused unit, diversity is key. Determine an objective that has been assigned to you by a superior officer, and accomplish it in a manner appropriate for your character. This could be anything from stealing data to taking out a target, to sorting the Quaestor's horrible recycling bin of horrors.

Platform

Word, OpenOffice, or Google Docs, send 'em up.

Details

300 words minimum, no word cap, because you can't put a limit on creativity.