Ohio, Ohio, great river, large creek,
Shirtless in the stands, off the field not so meek,
Football aside, we have some really good chilli,
Even if we prefer it poured over spaghetti,

Presidents, Presidents, most are from here,
So celebrate with us and open a beer,
Scarlet and Grey and right next to Canada,
But seriously, stop confusing us with Iowa,

Cincinnati, Columbus and Cleveland make three,
Everyone claims to be from an Ohioan city,
We stand tall and proud but we’re also friendly,
Family around us, and the will to live simply.

Ohio, Ohio
To that state
LeBron said goodbye-o

He packed up his shit
His team he did quit
And to South Beach he did fly-o

Ohio fans were sad
and then they were mad
They told him to kiss their behinds

The fans started a fire
Threw their jerseys into the pyre
And totally lost their damn minds

Until the day came
All his fortune and fame
Two championships under his belt

The Heat finally lost
So LeBron, he then tossed
The second team to which he had dealt

LeBron then went home
To a stadium sponsored by Quicken Loan
The fans came back in a hurry

Until the NBA Final
Where they watched their idol
Get his ass beat by Stephen Curry

Ohio of the former states,
Why must you leave us so?
From now on we will not be mates,
Even when there's no snow.

Your seasons are all jacked to hell,
You never gave two fucks.
But we all shall still wish you well,
As a land of Canucks.

Buckeyes, Bengals, and the Browns fans,
May be sad that you leave.
I may have lived within your lands,
But I surely won't grieve.

Oh Canada
Land of pucks
Of snow and syrup
Funny flag and all

Oh Canada
Some call you Ohio
Others know better
Hockey and all

Oh Canada
The great white
Your beer is crap
Labatt blue and all

No, I don't rhyme.