The vast, volcano dotted landscape was as deadly as it was saturated with the dark side. Rivers of lava carved their way into twisted wreaths of fire, accented by the desolate husks of starships from a time long forgotten. Why anyone would be sent to such a place was truly the question of the day, but orders were orders and they were to be carried out with perfection. Clutching his cloak closer to his body to block the ash and dancing flames, Commander Ironius continued forward as 9T9 scouted not far behind.
The sounds of some native creature shrieking in pain drew his attention to the east. Climbing over rock after jagged rock, Dek was greeted by the sight of a tall woman pushing one of the four legged animals deeper into one of the lava pits with a single finger to its forehead, a sinister smile poised upon her lips. The creature burst into flames. His brow furrowed momentarily, likely determining how to approach the scene at hand. One of the massive mountains of magma far behind him erupted in its fury, causing tremors to shake beneath his feet as rocks gave way and he slid halfway down from his perch.
“You not so quiet,” she spoke, loudly, over the final, gurgled shrieks of the animal as superheated lava consumed it: another life taken to sustain the dark energies of Oricon.
He of no power, Carrie. He weak. He simple, the dark alter whispered gleefully within her mind.
C’ree turned, slowly, to face the man who was now firmly standing before her. Dek’s military uniform and blaster pistol were fully visible as she licked her lips, taking in his presence. From behind the man, the rocks shifted again, but nothing was seen. With a heavy sigh, C’ree took a step towards the Palatinae, then one more.
“Why you here, of places? No safe here. Only death.”
“Is that a threat? I don’t even know who you are. I, for one, am Dek Ironius II of Scholae Palatinae. Surely you’ve heard of me,” the man stated, his name obviously carrying some weight for C’ree had heard of him, even if just in passing. “I assume you are one of those Lotus lovers. I was told to expect one here, though intelligence as of late has been unreliable.”
With a snort, C’ree rapped her fingers upon the pommel of her saber before looking back to the rocks behind the man, hearing them shift again. This time, however, a metallic hand came into view, pulling up the hulking mass of an IG-100 MagnaGuard. The chromed body gleamed brightly with the reds and oranges of the lava around them.
“Ooh,” C’ree breathed, her hand now gripping Pieces of Home. “Shiny…”
“I would advise you leave us be so we may find those we are looking for, girl,” the Commander stated plainly, quickly turning away from the pink skinned woman and muttering to himself. “If I were a Lotus agent, where would I hide…”
He want to harm them. They say you no harm them, none harm them. I no like new rules, but we listen to family. We protect family, Carrie!
“You no find them,” C’ree stated with a deliberate twinge of malice. “I make you leave.”
“What? No, I—“ Dek began, but was quickly cut off as he turned to see the woman close the distance between them ever so quickly.
In an instant, 9T9 was at the fore, its electrotstaff blazing to life as it met the unstable violet shaft that had spurt from Pieces of Home. The two struggled against one another, Dek watching with mild amusement. C’ree gave out a rage filled scream and relaxed her stance, dipping down underneath the droid. Her quick actions caused 9T9 to lose footing and topple forwards towards the river of lava as the Sephi-hybrid rolled under its legs and back to her feet.
With each footfall, the Commander could tell that this woman wanted to kill, but he would not go down without a fight. The man quickly drew his personal firearm and disengaged the safety, though he was smart enough to not point it threateningly just yet.
“I suppose there is just not reasoning with you, hmm?”
“No reason,” C’ree stated plainly and leapt through the air towards the “simple man.”
Syntax
Using the comma placement to create an aside here for "loudly" reads rather odd in terms of flow.
Should be "just no reasoning" here.
Story
You had a lot of build-up without a significant pay off for the combat. The fight itself almost felt like an afterthought to your setting of the mood and establishing the characters. That portion you did well, but the pacing needs to be controlled for a 2+2 match. I would have liked to see more action, rather than the rather static exchange between the two leading up to the sudden attack. It's also somewhat confusing that you go from Dek assuming C'ree is "one of those Lotus lovers" and then starts muttering about "if I were a Lotus agent where would I hide".
Realism
Unless explicitly stated as inclusive with the possession item, Droids don't have any special weapons outside of what is on the owner's Loadout. In this case, the description says Magnaguards are designed to fight Jedi "through the use of an electrostaff", not that they have one included. Dek doesn't have an electrostaff, so his droid doesn't either.