Seer Kordath Bleu d'Tana vs. Warrior Blade Ta'var

Seer Kordath Bleu d'Tana

Equite 3, Equite tier, Clan Arcona
Male Ryn, Force Disciple, Arcanist, Krath
vs.

Warrior Blade Ta'var

Equite 1, Equite tier, Clan Scholae Palatinae
Female Zeltron, Sith, Arcanist
Comment

First let me apologize for the wait on this judgment and thank you both for your patience.

This match was an absolute pleasure both as a reader and a judge. This was higher level ACC and the scores reflect that. From a syntax standpoint I had to dig to find much of anything to ding you on. Excellent work both of you, buy your proofers something nice for the holidays. Realism ended up being a wash due to you both having a single minor detractor each, though side by side Kordath's was the more obvious of the two. Blade's realism error was right on the line between comment and minor detractor. I had to ding blade on continuity mainly because her description of Kordath's flashbangs was such a clear contradiction between his earlier post. If that ding seems harsh let me reiterate how this is higher level ACC. Championships have turned on the description of a saber color. I want to see you both in future tournaments (just not in my bracket :P ) and it's better to learn these lessons now in for fun matches than when the glory of your Clan is on the line. Story wise you both got 4s according to the rubric but this is a situation where I wish I could give fractions because there was a distinction between the two of you. All things being equal, Kord had the better story and would have still won even if there was a score tie. That's mainly because he had more action in his posts and his ending had a clear victor. He also used both characters slightly better than Blade. It's splitting hairs really but as a reader I felt more connected to both characters in Kord's posts than I did in Blade's.

Congratulations to you both on an extremely well fought match but there can be only one winner and that is...

Kordath Bleu

Hall Duelist Hall - Old Container
Messages 4 out of 4
Time Limit 7 Days
Battle Style Alternative Ending
Battle Status Judged
Combatants Seer Kordath Bleu d'Tana, Warrior Blade Ta'var
Winner Seer Kordath Bleu d'Tana
Force Setting Standard
Weapon Setting Standard
Seer Kordath Bleu d'Tana's Character Snapshot Snapshot
Warrior Blade Ta'var's Character Snapshot Snapshot
Venue Kashyyyk: Rainforest Canopies
Last Post 8 December, 2016 12:10 AM UTC
Assigned Judge Champion Rajhin Cindertail
Syntax - 15%
Aurora "Aura" Ta'var General Stres'tron'garmis
Score: 4 Score: 4
Rationale: Only one or two things I had to nitpick to find, nothing that detracted from reading. Rationale: Very very few mistakes but nothing that detracted from reading.
Story - 40%
Aurora "Aura" Ta'var General Stres'tron'garmis
Score: 4 Score: 4
Rationale: You did an excellent job describing the venue and making it feel alive and a part of your story. You used both CS's well in your conflict but you didn't do much with the actual combat. Also you underplayed Kordath in both your opening and ending posts. Still, your use of the character's aspects brought you from a 3 to a weak 4. Rationale: You didn't use the venue as well as Blade did, but you absolutely shined in the use of the characters (as usual). I laughed, I winced, I wanted to read more. You also had a healthy amount of action and a clearer resolution which set your story apart from your opponent. Overall, a strong 4.
Realism - 25%
Aurora "Aura" Ta'var General Stres'tron'garmis
Score: 4 Score: 4
Rationale: See my comments on the endurance issue. Rationale: See my comments on the flashbang issue.
Continuity - 20%
Aurora "Aura" Ta'var General Stres'tron'garmis
Score: 4 Score: 5
Rationale: You had the one issue with the flashbang which directly contradicted what Kord wrote in his post. Rationale: No issues that I could see.
Aurora "Aura" Ta'var's Score: 4.0 General Stres'tron'garmis's Score: 4.2
Posts

Kashyyyk Rainforest Canopies

The wild planet of Kashyyyk is known to be home to the gentle, but short-tempered race of Wookiees. Wild and untamed, the lush, wroshyr tree-filled forests form a multi-layered deathtrap. The local wildlife presenting more dangers as one descends towards the forest floor. However, as one ascends the vertical environment, the danger of falling increases until one comes in contact with the Wookiee settlements. Fauna and flora flourish in delight, growing within dirt pockets in the crevices of the trees. Some of these plants are carnivorous, becoming larger and deadlier closer to the forest floor. Others have some form of consciousness, able to communicate with the Wookiees to give some understanding of their use.

Kashyyyk Rainforest Canopies

Above the Wookie settlements rests the wild rainforest canopies. Within the crevices of the trees, empty fruit and rotting shells from seeds show the spring season has ended. A soft wind whistles between the thick vines and shrubs that stick to the trunks of the ancient and sleeping giants. Despite the never-ending lack of footholds aside from the branches of wroshyr trees, a series of abandoned and rotting platforms are suspended a hundred meters above the surface, once home to its own Wookiee settlement. Overgrown and decayed, it has since nourished countless plants and trees with their outstretched branches sheltering the dense and soft floor from the extreme sun rays and torrential rain. Upon closer inspection unusual signals become noteable. Moss carpets particular areas on the platforms and nowhere else, and tree-dwelling animals and birds never seem to land on the surface.

Tread carefully, or fall whim to the creatures that inhabit this terrain.

Blade Ta’var sat high in a clump of branches, only partially hidden by leaves as she watched the wookiee settlement below her perch. She had wedged herself securely against several cross-cutting limbs and was thoroughly enjoying the show as roars, growls, and playful laughs filled the air. Wookiees of all shapes and sizes passed by her with little more than a glance, focusing on the daily rigors of life and chasing down their hyper cubs. Angry roars from parents co-mingled with their young’s high pitched yells as several families chased each other around and among the trees. Local shopkeepers shook hairy fists as they tried to keep their merchandise safe.

The Warrior smiled at the mayhem and grinned as an idea came to mind. She picked an unripe berry and used the Force to levitate it, focusing on the back of an adult wookiee’s head. She propelled it forward like a tossed dart, using the Force to guide it.

Rawr!

She didn’t hear it hit, but she certainly heard the annoyed roar. The parent looked around and saw some giggling children. They ran off as the older wookiee chased after them. She took another unripe berry and then another. Again and again she flung them at furry heads until mayhem reigned supreme. A smile spread across her face as she inhaled the turbulent atmosphere she had created, only to be replaced by a look of curiosity.

A Ryn, rare for this part of the galaxy, was slinking through the crowded merchant corridor. A quick grab here and another there. So quick and efficient that the merchants didn’t know what had hit them as they watched the spectacle unfolding in front of them. The Sith frowned as she watched the Ryn Seer look for a safe exit, pacing right and left as the locals took up ample space in their excitement.

Not this time, thief…

The Zeltron Arcanist quickly climbed down a larger tree branch, using the Force to jump down to the middle of the village square. Gathering energy into her leg muscles, she landed on the balls of her feet and let herself fall seamlessly into a roll, pushing off the ground as she transitioned into a run. She snapped her head back towards Kordath’s general direction, only to see a furry tuft of tail round a hut several meters away.

The Warrior sprinted off after him, giving the Wookiees a wide berth. As she rounded the dwelling she saw the furry gray Ryn run off towards the rope bridge leading to the next platform.

“Hey! Come back here!”

Kordath slowed to a stop as he looked over his shoulder.

“Not another one... Leave meh alone. What ya want?” The Arconan asked tentatively, knees bent and ready to flee.

The Palatinaean slowed to a stop within a few meters of him and put her hands on hips.

“You stole from them. Give it back.”

“Eh? Wasn’t me. Prom’se. Bug off.” The Ryn turned to leave.

“I’d rethink that choice. It’s bad to steal, especially from innocents.” Blade threatened in a calm voice.

“Don’t know what yer talkin bout. Wasn’t me...”

“Fine. Have it your way.” The Zeltron reached out to the Force to attempt to stun him in place momentarily, but Kord was already sprinting away.

“Karkin’ Ryn…”

The Palatinaean growled as she rushed off after him, following him across the rope bridge. Her body swayed slightly with the swinging bridge as the Ryn clopped across its rungs. Tapping into the energy around her, the Warrior used the Force to push herself forward quicker and faster. The momentum of the bridge barely affecting her as she pushed off the balls of her feet in what felt like a blur.

Clop. Clop. Clop.

Kord disappeared behind a massive tree trunk as he ran around it.

Frak! I’m losing him.

The Zeltron Arcanist chased after him and skidded to a halt, but he was gone. Heart beating, she looked around in despair. Hope burgeoned as a faint grunting noise came from above. Looking up, she saw a tail wag nervously to and fro just out of reach as the Arconan was already climbing up the massive tree.

Blade smiled wryly and climbed the tree after him, closing the gap between them with each foothold.

“Filthy thief! Come back here!” Blade yelled as she unleashed the full power of her pheromones.

“Eep!” The Ryn continued to climb but a moment’s distraction was more than enough. Blade dug her fingers into the next handhold and lifted herself up into his tail range. It’s furry end accidently hit the side of her head. She merely growled in annoyance and grabbed it with her free hand, wrapping it around her hand once.

“Let er go!” Kord pleaded.

Blade grinned mischievously and pulled it down as hard as she could. The Ryn yelped and tried to wriggle away. The Warrior squeezed down even harder and yanked the tail down again, sliding a little in her footholds.

“Oww!”

Kord seemed steady at first but several breaths later he tilted backwards and fell back towards the platform. Blade hastily flattened herself against the tree, gripping the tree tightly in the hope that the Arconan would fall harmlessly past her.

Champion Rajhin Cindertail, 20 December, 2016 12:48 AM UTC

Syntax

A quick grab here and another there. So quick and efficient that the merchants didn’t know what had hit them as they watched the spectacle unfolding in front of them.

You repeat the word "quick"

What ya want?” The Arconan asked tentatively, knees bent and ready to flee.

The comma after tentatively should be a semicolon or a period.

Story

You did an excellent job painting the picture of the scene in the reader's mind. The venue felt dynamic and alive in your post. The conflict you introduced was a somewhat clever play on Blade's justice aspect and the classic thieving Ryn trope. The biggest part of your post you could improve on was more of Kordath besides him running and basically being too meek. I feel like you underplayed Kord a bit, especially his resourcefulness and that left an otherwise solid opening feeling a bit too one-sided.

Kordath yelped as he lost his grip. Twisting and flailing as he fell, he felt a hand get purchase on something warm and tightened his grip reflexively. A tearing sound could be heard as his descent continued, as well as an indignant cry from above as he hit the platform below on all fours, tail flicking in annoyance as the impact made his entire body shake. He praised himself on his natural nimbleness for avoiding landing on his head, and glanced down to see what was in his hand before his ears began to burn. A glance up confirmed his suspicions — a stretch of red skin was exposed by what he’d snagged on his fall.

Do I run again? Do I wait? Oh kark, she’s gonna bleedin’ kill me whoever she is!

Indecision cost him precious seconds as the Zeltron above slid down the tree trunk, curses trailing out of her mouth. She landed with admirable grace before rounding on him with a fist raised, only to find him holding one hand out before him. His other was shielding his face. The blue haired woman opened and closed her mouth several times as she stared at the bit of torn cloth in the hand in front of her.

“I know ya saw me pilferin’ a bit, lass, but I swear on me mum that this bit was an accident. Though ta be fair, it was yer fault, yankin’ a man’s bleedin’ tail like yer ringin’ a bloody bell!”

She snatched the cloth from his hand and tried to determine how to wrap it in a way to cover her mishap. Her frustration became more evident when she realized it wasn’t long enough to actually fix the problem.

“Dirty, rotten thieving…” she grumbled as she worked.

“Oi! You did this yerself, luv, I was just havin’ a bit of a stroll—”

She glared at him anew, cutting him off with a look. “You were stealing from those people!”

“Well ta be fair it wasn’t much, and not more than a bit from each one; ya gotta have a code afterall.”

“That doesn’t change the fact that I’m taking you back to those Wookiees so you can answer for your crime!” she declared, loud and firm.

If not for her being one of the red-skinned devils — Kordath had a bad string of luck when it came to them — he’d have found the entire display enticing. The last Zeltron he’d dealt with had wrapped him around her finger for months, using him against his Clan and forcing him to do things he still regretted. Before that had been one that had beaten him, nailed his tail to a table and used his identity to infiltrate Arcona in an attempt to kill the now-Shadow Lady. He had a distinct distrust for the pheromone-spewing red skins at this point. Which was a shame, because she was quite fit, as he’d noticed when she was coming down the tree with half her arse hanging out.

“Right, yer gonna march me up ta tha Wooks, past their playin’ kids and tha like, and turn me over?”

She reached to her belt and produced a set of stun cuffs with a look of determination. “That’s right. Quietly, or otherwise, up to you.”

Kordath nodded, gray eyes lit with mischief. “Aye, yer gonna do all that with yer red cheeks stickin’ out of yer trousers. Not that I’m complain’, I’ll follow ya nice and quiet if ya want, long as that’s goin’ on.”

He watched as she seemed to quiver in indignation, laughing inside his own head as he held both hands up in a placating manner.

“I’ll do ya a solid, seein’ as I did, uhh, tear tha pants and all,” he said, shrugging out of his coat and holding it out. “Wrap that about yerself, I know you Zeltrons like paradin’ about in tha tight clothes and all that nonsense, but at least make yerself decent, eh?”

“That...is surprisingly honorable of you. I’ll be certain to let the local authority know you came without a fight and even assisted your captor in her time of, um, trouble,” she spoke, seemingly uncertain if she believed her own words. Stowing the cuffs, she began to wrap the jacket’s sleeves around her waist, the leather material not being the most cooperative of things for such a task. Distracted by this, she failed to see the Ryn slip a hand behind his back and retrieve something. She did notice as she pulled the sleeves tight that he’d began to run across the platform, and that the scrap of her pants was gone.

“A trophy? Really you little—” she looked down to see a small black cylinder skipping across the wood, having been tossed over his shoulder as he ran. It exploded with a bright flash and loud popping sound, filling her ears. An arm thrown across her eyes saved most of her vision, though the ringing that resounded in her head was throwing her off balance. Despite that she glared daggers at the running Ryn, drawing and throwing a knife at him as he fled. The blade tucked itself in a tree trunk as he rounded it and she saw him come out the other side, jumping from the edge of the platform towards one further down, hitting it with a roll.

Kordath Bleu glanced back up at the very angry Zeltron and gave her a cocky wave.

He’d had a moment of panic when he hit the platform despite his confident attitude. His chosen path was taking him further from the village proper and into parts that seemed abandoned. A bit of wood had creaked in an alarming manner when he landed, making him think he knew why this area was vacant. Still, he decided, it was better than getting cuffed and dragged off to face Wookiee justice. He liked his arms where they were.

Trusting that the Force would warn him of a misstep, the Ryn took off at a trot, watching for branches that could be used as paths or vines that looked trustworthy to get him further from the Zeltron hunting him. She’d not even given him a name, not that he’d shared his own. Still, he grinned as he stuck a hand in his pocket to touch the clothing he’d torn from her. At least with that he could determine how far she was. Ducking behind an old Wookiee home built into the side of one of the massive tree trunks to catch his breath, he focused on the fabric.

That ain’t right, she’s gettin’ closer? I mean, she caught up with me once already, yeah, but how’s she bleedin’ trackin’ me through tha forest? Even bein’ able to feel me through tha Force ain’t enough for her ta stay on me trail this...well…

His mental process caused him to lean back and smack his head into the wall behind him.

“She can bloody track tha same as me, can’t she? And I gave her my blasted coat. Good coat, wear it all tha time, probably lead her right ta me. Grand. So much for runnin’ away,” he muttered aloud with a sigh.

Champion Rajhin Cindertail, 20 December, 2016 1:52 AM UTC

Syntax

That ain’t right, she’s gettin’ closer?

Even in dialogue, this would still be a semicolon (or other conjunction) instead of a comma.

Story

This post did everything a follow-up post is supposed to do. You expanded upon the conflict introduced in the first post and did so in a way that really made both characters shine. You also shifted the location a bit and used a different part of the venue. And to top it all off you had your usual strong bits of comedy making the post a pleasure to read. I have little in the way of story that you could have improved this post. Well done.

Realism

drawing and throwing a knife at him as he fled. The blade tucked itself in a tree trunk as he rounded it

There were a few problems with the whole flashbang passage. First, there's not really a way to partially protect one's self from the flash. Either she covered her eyes or she didn't. Even a partial exposure would mess with her vision and prevent the glaring you described. The big issue is she was disoriented, even by your description. There's no way she'd be able to throw a knife successfully enough to stick it into a tree that quickly. This is a minor realism detractor.

Blade rolled onto the lower platform with a thud and walked around the abandoned wookiee homes, one hand on Kord’s jacket as she homed in on his presence. She took a deep breath and reached out to everything around her using the Force. The forest planet teemed with life, but one nervous aura stood out close by. She followed it past a variety of plant-based obstacles and found an old wookiee home. She smiled to herself as she crept closer.

The Zeltron was but a few meters away before her plans were ruined. A metal ball sailed through the air towards her. She channelled the Force and focused on the projectile. In her mind, she felt the object slow down as her invisible fist swung through the air and whacked it away from her. Time seemed to move in fast forward as it flew harmlessly to her left, detonating in a brilliant flash that lit up the underbelly of Kashyyk’s tall trees. Blade wanted to admire the forest but another flash bang followed swiftly after. She swung again, smacking it harmlessly away to her right with the Force.

“Gotta love these fireworks. Stop being a coward and give back the stuff you stole. Or else…”

The Arcanist waited patiently as she kept an eye out for any fleeing Ryn. She stood still and listened for the smallest of sounds. A creak of wood or the shuffle of steps would be all she needed to pinpoint his exact position. She was about to break the silence but Kord spoke first.

“What if I do? You’ll just pull me tail.”

“I promise to behave if you promise to behave. Come on. Turn yourself in.” Blade offered as she let loose her pheromones.

A tuft of white hair waved back and forth in and out of sight, coming from behind the home.

“Don’t be nervous. Come out and play.” The Zeltron chuckled softly as she watched the tail pick up speed before disappearing from sight for good.

“Tha’s what the last one said!” The Arconan ran away from her at a sprint.

The Palatinaean sprinted after him, trusting the Force to keep her on the platforms. Kord looked over his shoulder every once in awhile, yipped, and kept running. Eventually he started to slow down. She was just catching up until he suddenly disappeared behind the nearest massive tree trunk. Surprised, she hurtled after him at breakneck speed, running past him for a second before she was forced to skid to a stop. Kord’s jacket slipped off, but the Warrior couldn’t care less right now. She wanted to stop him. Blade quickly got back up and circled around the tree as she looked up. Nothing. She looked back towards the nearest rope bridge she had just crossed and saw a now-familiar tuft of white hair.

“Schutta!”

She took off after him once more, feet pounding against the ancient wood. Their sick game of ‘Kashyyyk Hide and Seek’ was getting wearisome. The Warrior was already starting to pant. Fortunately, Kord ran out of gas first. The Ryn slowed to a halt, hands on his sides as he heaved. The Zeltron followed right behind him, stopping a few feet away. The Sith activated her saber with a snap-hiss and pointed it accusingly at Kord. He stood up straight despite his exhaustion.

“I swear. If you run away one more time I’ll stick my lightsaber so far up your ass you’ll see the light. Last warning. Give back the stolen goods or else…” she threatened with a glare.

“You don’t want to hurt the Ryn. The Ryn is innocent.” The Arconan waved his hand.

A familiar sensation came over her. One that urged her to believe every word. She felt as if they were her own for a few seconds. Another thought played in her mind though and it included every scene of their chase. She looked at the still slightly heaving Ryn and compared it to her previous memories.

Is he innocent? Why would he run though?

She wasn’t sure which just yet but knew what she wanted. She wanted Kord to cut it out and give everything back. She didn’t need to kill him for it.

“Look. I don’t want to hurt you, but you’re as guilty as they come. I’m not letting you get away with theft.”

“Eh, how about a deal?”

“Why would I make a deal with you?” she asked skeptically.

“I’ll return what I borrowed.”

“And what do you want?”

“For you to stop chasin’ me. We’re causin’ a scene and I’d rather not attract the Wookiees’ attention. ”

“You mean you don’t want your arms torn off.”

“Tha too. Yeah. Have you seen how fast they can climb?”

“Hand it over then,” she demanded.

“Turn off your lightsaber. And wha you do to me favorite coat?” Kord asked in a displeased tone.

The Sith eyed Kord for a few minutes before turning her saber off, keeping it in her hand just in case.

“Your coat fell off somewhere back there when I skidded past you. I don’t know where it is.” The Warrior pointed a thumb behind her in the general direction of the old settlements.

The Ryn looked sad but she broke his reverie quickly.

“Hand it all over, including the bit of my clothes. Now,” she demanded yet again.

Kord continued to grumble about his favorite jacket, but nonetheless emptied his meagre loot onto the ground. In addition to her torn cloth, she saw a few food items, a bottle of some liquid, and some pretty gems pushed in her direction. She arched a brow in confusion.

“You went through all this trouble for this?”

“Gifts ya know. For a lady friend.” The Arconan looked annoyed.

“All this trouble for a girl.” Blade shook her head, but couldn’t help smirking. She picked up the loot and secured it in a small bag that hung from one of the containers on her belt. “Look. Just buy this stuff for her. Less hassle. Anyways, I need a few drinks… Know a good watering hole?”

“Eh, sure. What’s your name?”

“Blade. Just Blade.” The Sith looked at him warily.

“Kord. Just Kord. Follow me. I hope you enjoy the climb up. Can I keep the purple gem at least? It’s her favorite color.” The Ryn whined.

The Zeltron merely smiled.

“You can buy one when we get up there. Must be a special lady.”

“Tha best. But let’s go get me jacket first…”

Champion Rajhin Cindertail, 20 December, 2016 2:12 AM UTC

Story

She channelled the Force and focused on the projectile. In her mind, she felt the object slow down as her invisible fist swung through the air and whacked it away from her. Time seemed to move in fast forward as it flew harmlessly to her left, detonating in a brilliant flash that lit up the underbelly of Kashyyk’s tall trees.

I love this passage. It's a great description of using telekinesis to deflect a projectile.


While I did d'awww a bit at the special lady part, your resolution to the conflict was a bit underwhelming. If I had to pinpoint it I'd say you had Kord give up too easily. There's a lot more he could have done rather than try to run again. The mind trick attempt was a nice touch and them ending on friendly terms was fine, I just felt you could have extended the conflict a little longer and give the reader a clearer winner.

Continuity

A metal ball sailed through the air towards her.

So both Kord's earlier post, wookiepedia and the possessions store all agree that a flashbang or flash grenade is cylinder shaped and not ball shaped. I don't know where you got ball-shaped from except the legends wookiepedia page for flashbang shows a ball shaped grenade (which is wrong). I have to give you the benefit of the doubt on the wookiepedia page and the possessions page (since loadouts aren't part of the CS yet) but I can ding you for continuity because Kord specifically described his flashbangs as cylinder shaped.

Realism

The Warrior was already starting to pant. Fortunately, Kord ran out of gas first. The Ryn slowed to a halt, hands on his sides as he heaved.

While I appreciate you trying to use the difference between their respective levels of endurance here, this is a minor realism ding. Kordath has +2 endurance which according to the wiki makes him "On par with a seasoned military soldier. You go on long distance runs daily and rarely get winded unless under heavy duress or injured." All Kord has done up to this point is run, climb and jump. Had they actually been fighting I could buy the exhaustion but he hasn't done anything to this point that would exhaust a "seasoned military solider." The same goes for Blade.

“Oh, no, you’re not getting away,” came a voice from above him.

Bleu sighed. This was turning into way more of a chore than he’d expected today. This was starting to feel like work. “Yer quick, lass, give ya that. Maybe we can call it a draw, eh? Find somewhere for lunch, maybe a few drinks, talk this out?”

“Not on your life, thief!”

“That’s hurtful that is! Ain’t nice ta define a bloke on tha one thing ya seen him do. Maybe I’m stealin’ ta feed some orphans or somethin’, ya ever think about that!?” he shouted up at her. She was crouched atop the old home, ready to pounce from the look of her. The sight was both intimidating and a bit alluring, and he wondered if he was too close. Were the pheromones already at work? It was a possibility, he realized, shuffling back a bit.

Piercing blue eyes took him in from under short blue hair, her pink face twisting into something almost like a grin. The first emotion he’d seen aside from self-righteousness, that gave the Ryn a bit of hope. “Are you?” she asked.

“Am I wot?”

“Stealing for orphans?”

“I, uhh, I could be. Ya know where any are around here?” he replied with a shaky grin.

She jumped down at him, her feet zeroed in on his narrow chest. The Arconan sidestepped, if barely, the telegraphed strike. When the Force screamed a warning at him he was confused until a pink arm wrapped itself around his head as she flew past him. He let out a yelp as she brought him down to the platform, slamming the back of his head through the old and rotted logs. Dark depths greeted him when he opened his eyes, causing him to feel the first inklings of panic as dizziness and vertigo tried to strike. Instead, he was tugged out of the hole, much to his joy.

“Can ya nae do that again, lass?” he asked, gray eyes wide as he felt her step behind his sitting form. She grabbed one of his arms and pulled it back, and he felt something slap around a wrist.

Uh-oh

When she went for his free arm he bent it at the elbow, holding his palm up, and channeled the Force through it into a blinding flash of light. He heard her curse, and despite his efforts to keep his own vision clear his own right eye was filled with spots. Kordath pushed himself to his feet and turned to face the Zeltron. Running wasn’t an option at this point. Still, killing folks wasn’t his style, even if all he really had to do at this point was kick her off the edge of the platform. Instead, he reached down to his thigh and pulled the sapphire blade out, spinning it in his hand and raising the pommel.

One good hit to the side of the head, he decided, as he pulled the Force to give him strength, should knock her out. By the time she woke up, without his jacket for that matter, he’d be long gone. He took a deep breath and began to line up his shot, only to see her blink away the tears his flash of light had brought up, blue eyes fixing on him through a squint. Obviously, she couldn’t see all that well, he had to strike, why was he delaying?

He saw her lower lip quiver, actually bloody stuck out a bit and pouted, “You wouldn’t hit a girl when she can’t even see, would you?”

“Wh..what?”

The Zeltron’s shoulders slumped. She looked so defeated he started to feel sorry, the tears adding to the effect. He shook his head. Something wasn’t right, he wasn’t sure what but the danger sense he relied on so much was buzzing at him, as if in confusion.

“I, I just wanted to do the right thing! I’m sorry, maybe it was mean of me,” she sniffled, still down where she’d been kneeling, blinking up at him with those crystalline eyes.

Kordath shuffled his feet, his blade lowering. He felt foolish, like he was about to strike a scared kid. He blinked as she grabbed his off hand, her touch warm.

“Please, I’m so sorry!” She was still looking up at him. Something still felt off and he couldn’t figure out what. And then it hit him.

Or rather, she did, her other hand coming to grab him by the wrist. Using the hold and her crouching stance, she pulled him in as she shot herself upwards. The crown of her head impacted with his chin, knocking the Ryn for a loop, his eyes rolling into the back of his head. Kordath crumpled to the ground without a sound, his last conscious thought being about bloody pheromones.

Blade Ta’var rolled the Ryn over, wincing at the headache she’d given herself even as she secured his other cuff. At least he was small enough to carry back to the village.

Champion Rajhin Cindertail, 20 December, 2016 2:46 AM UTC

Story

Maybe I’m stealin’ ta feed some orphans or somethin’, ya ever think about that!?” he shouted up at her.

Oh snap! I mean he isn't...but it is a solid retort.


A solid ending overall. You had a clear winner of the conflict and actual combat which is always a good thing. The whole exchange over stealing to feed orphans was a great way to use aspects of both characters and to highlight the difference in their philosophies.